Defining Success (outside of wealth)
How do you define success?
This was a question I asked someone recently.
Their answer?
The amount of money I have.
On the surface this makes sense.
Money is easily measured and provides freedom to spend your time as you wish, remove problems money can buy, travel comfortably, provide climate-controlled shelter in affluent areas with clean running water and high-quality food.
Media does a great job of deepening this fact by emphasizing the value of money as a one-way ticket to happiness, status, respect, intelligence, hard work, and talent.
But as we dive deeper, we quickly realize this is only partially true:
If you could trade places with a 92-year-old worth $500 million dollars but only had 1 year left to live, would you do it?
No, because you won’t have time to enjoy it.
Time is more valuable than money.
If you could instantly receive $500 million dollars but you had to trade your most loved family member, would you do it?
No, because you’ll lose a loved one.
Family is more valuable than money.
If you could instantly receive $500 million dollars but you had to live in a wheelchair the rest of your life, would you do it?
No, because you’ll lose your health.
Health is more important than money.
This places money at least 4th on this list in level of importance (with more I’m sure we could collectively come up with).
But this doesn’t change the firm grasp money has on our perception of success.
This isn’t to say you shouldn’t strive for more wealth, according to the stoics, wealth is what is known as a preferred indifferent.
We would rather be rich over poor, so wealth is preferred; but since we do not have full and complete control over this outcome, we must be indifferent to whether we generate large sums of wealth.
If you place your ideal of success on an outcome you don’t have control over, you could easily blame yourself for an outcome that was not up to you.
Our value judgment of wealth determines its grasp on us.
I find it’s not money that we want, rather, we want the feeling of what we perceive money to bring:
Less worry, more freedom, more respect, more happiness.
But while money may assist in these acts, you can’t go to the store and buy less worry.
Leave your definition of success up to your body, property, possessions, reputation, or status and you’ll end up continually playing Russian roulette with your preferred outcome.
Leave success up to your actions, desires, aversions, opinions, impulses, and herein lies your freedom.
What is material success if we end up stressed, high strung, and unhappy?
We all die with empty pockets.